HideYourClothesline

I’m of the opinion that clothesline wars can be resolved with ingenuity rather than legislation.

Opponents to clotheslines don’t want to see their neighbor’s underwear. They also don’t want to see what they consider to be disorderly. These objections are within our reach to remedy at a low cost.

The simple objective is to:

A. Hide the clothes

B. Be orderly

Americans have been solving this kind of problem for centuries. Just look at some listings in the yellow pages: bins, boxes, cabinets, canopies, curtains, cubicles, doors, enclosed trailers, fences, lockers, safes, shades, sheds, storage units, tarps, window-tinting. We even have magicians who hide elephants for a living.

We are absolutely professionals at hiding stuff. Can anyone tell me what is in the average woman’s handbag? Would she want everybody to see what’s inside? Definitely not! Ask Elaine from Seinfeld! That is precisely why there are no transparent handbags on the market.

Therefore, if we have the technology to hide feminine products right on the table of a five-star restaurant, then keeping underwear from our neighbor’s line of sight ought to be child’s play! We need to stop thinking in terms of laws and started thinking in terms of ingenuity.

Oftentimes, whenever we need a solution, we can find it online. Imagine this:

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HideYourClothesline.com

Welcome to our website!

Hide your clothesline in broad daylight!

Keeping clothesline neighbors happy since 2009!

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In conclusion, if electric utilities are willing to explore expensive offshore placement of their windmills for the sake of aesthetics, then an inexpensive innovation to hide your underwear is a small price to pay to allow you to have a clothesline. I’ve written previous blogs offering ideas how to hide a clothesline. Perhaps somebody has a better way.

A Drying Canopy Proposal

Today’s article from Perkasie, PA titled “U.S. residents fight for the right to hang laundry” has caught my attention.

There are two sides to every story.

Story A: “We use a clothesline to save energy.”

Story B: “We don’t want to see our neighbor’s underwear.”

Both stories are reasonable; so let’s find a way to satisfy both. Instead of having laws, either for or against something, where we end up with gloating winners and bitter losers, let’s use our Yankee ingenuity so everybody can win.

Suppose we manufacture a drying canopy. (See figure) Special, breathable sides act as a privacy screen so a person can hang as many Fruit of the Looms as they want. Meanwhile, all your neighbors see is a tidy canopy.

The sides on the canopy would let the air pass through and the roof would make it so that rain is no longer a factor.

Here’s how VISA would lay out the compromise:

Clothesline: $25

Electric Drier: $500

Drying Canopy: $150

Ending Clothesline Wars: Priceless

Doing The Laundry With Martha

I am an unabashed fan of Martha Stewart, have been for years. Maybe because we both grew up in large families of six kids, with practical hardworking parents. Or maybe because I appreciate all the hands-on housekeeping things she does and promotes, all done with a sense of beauty and class. In any event, I love most everything she does.

I was reading Martha's "30 Things Everyone Should Know" on her website. Of course, being the avid laundress I am, I was interested in her "Do The Laundry" piece:

http://www.marthastewart.com/article/do-the-laundry

Overall, I feel she gives very good advice and clear instructions. What I find encouraging is her emphasis on air-drying "the old fashioned way". Over the years I have noticed that she is an enthusiastic hang-dryer, talking about it on many shows. Of course, she uses an electric dryer too, but I like how she gives clotheslines and drying racks equal billing.

What bothers me a little...okay, a lot, is her insistence on using hot water to wash whites. I must admit that I was always under the impression that hot water was the only way to wash whites. But I have seen the error of my ways from Project Laundry List, and now wash everything in cold. Yes, Martha, even whites! There is no difference in the whiteness, and they seem to get just as clean as washing in hot. I see no reason to waste hot water energy when it can be done just as efficiently in cold water.

Perhaps cold water washing could be "The 31st Thing Everyone Should Know"... right, Martha?!

Marilyn Huttunen